Chapter 3
Recess
2 weeks remained for the next story to begin. A story about another world. May be one of hope. Or hopelessness. Or both. And then a sudden abrupt recess. From everything that meant. From everything that was meaning to be. A recess, grappling for a parentheses, to be able to mean.
A recess that felt utterly devoid of meaning. And yet, silently a lifetime of meaning froze into it. A recess that proved that after all, this recess is all. A potent teller of stories never meant to be told. Stories so precious that they are best never told. — Priyanka Saha
The Lockdown Conundrum
As the lockdown stretches on, I’ve lost track of how many days have passed. I get out of bed at 1 p.m. and skip straight to lunch. As for work, I’ve been putting it off till evening, sometimes till night, and most often, till tomorrow or two days later. Lockdown makes sure I am not accountable to anyone.
For the first time since forever, my schedule for the day is empty. Sure, this sounds wonderful because I’ve opportunities to indulge in creative pursuits. But, I’ve no clue about what creative pursuit to indulge in and that’s terrifying.
I call this problem the “Lockdown Conundrum”.
But what is the solution?
Just because motivational pages on the internet urge me to not “waste” time, there’s no need for me to pressurize myself if I’m not doing enough. The world is consumed by a mad rush to produce more, to “invest in the future”. But it pays to remember that we humans shouldn’t measure our self-worth by how “productive” we are.
It’s wonderful on days when we manage to work. But on others, we need to learn to forgive ourselves for being lazy.
Not being productive doesn’t mean we aren’t good enough.
— Anangsha Alammyan